and the thought came to me, just sweet sixteen and full of night: who will deliver me from myself?

So I’m in the Frisco (because that’s what we locals call it (even though we deny it to you (because we hate you and don’t want you to have any part of our cool “calling it Frisco” club))), and I think I’ve come down with a case of the Whine Flu. And OMG, you guys, it hurts so goddamned bad that I can’t stand it!!!

That was a joke.

But since you’re stupid, here’s the gist: I used “whine flu” instead of the currently topical “swine flu,” because whine rhymes with swine. And then I whined about it. OMFGLOL!

Get it?

I didn’t figure. But trust me, it’s funny.

And I should probably mention that, just in case you’re reading this in six months when we’ve all forgotten about the swine flu just like we forgot about the AIDS and the SARS and the SIDS and the Lance Armstrong bracelets, “swine flu” was some bullshit that no one cared about but the news kept forcing it down our throats even though it was a Mexican issue and, really? We’re going to concern ourselves with the Mexicans now?

No offense Mexicans, but you’ll have to take the word of whoever told you I said that because you’re too busy roofing houses and cleaning hotel rooms and boxing and eating cats to blog hop. And the illiteracy puts a damper on things as well but, again, not apologizing because you’ll never know I said it.

But I digress.

I’m going to make some changes in my life. And I’m going to write a book or two. In your face.