09:21:2007 @ 06:27 AM

take my hand off to never neverland

I’m right-handed so, where masturbation is concerned, I really can’t get in the type of groove necessary if I try and turn southpaw. Coincidentally, I also have the hardest time working the mouse and clicking on thumbnails with my left hand.

So now you know my dilemma.

And why I’m wound so fucking tightly all the time.

posted by Crazy Lady on 09:21:2007 @ 08:17 PM

What a terrible problem - I guess you better work on being ambidextrous.

posted by Jack Smynde on 09:22:2007 @ 11:46 AM

You need a laptop so you can grind on the couch while you browse.

posted by {illyria} on 09:23:2007 @ 09:00 AM

jack here always steals my moves and passes them on as manly advice.

and then i wake up and find that i've been dreaming again.

posted by Jeremy C. Garland on 09:24:2007 @ 01:54 PM

Too bad you're gay. Otherwise, you could have sex with your wife.

posted by jeremy on 09:25:2007 @ 07:36 AM

crazy lady: that, or improve my imagination.

jack: i can't even work the little touch pad with my right hand.

poo cakes: you just need new moves. try the cabbage patch.

jeremy: you've clearly never met my wife.

posted by Kunstemaecker on 09:27:2007 @ 03:01 AM

You could click with your balls, that way you would have both hands free.

posted by Ima Wurdibitsch on 09:27:2007 @ 03:58 PM

You could lean over, move the mouse with your mouth and click with your tongue. Benefits abound! You build up your mouth and tongue strength for those marathon wife-pleasing sessions AND you eliminate the jealousy the mouse feels when it doesn't get wet and sticky like the keyboard!

BONUS!